I FOUND IT !

and oh i almost forget. for all those form-four-soon-to-be-s, im selling away all my reference and revision books from spm. i have loads of them for almost every subject even arts. just ...email me or facebook me or something. everything is going up for half price or less. im not talking about those thin scrawled exercise books but the thick really handy ones. you'll learn that the textbooks are really not enough when it comes to everything except history. i also have textbooks. loads of em. perhaps it might help me gather funds for candy canes. just contact me. i dont bite. im mildly tame unless unfed or pms. lots of loves(yet again)

now that im done cursing the world, hello planet earth! which reminds me of this really cute advert on discovery channel. i'll post it up if i can find it. really catchy and everything and so cute!

back in reality, oh this is really the worst holiday ever... there are so much to do and so little time. i need to get my drivers license which i had been pushing dates all year now, i want to get a job but who cares now im going to start college by january anyway, i want to have fun but since it was overly hyped during all the stress and strain of spm-the real thing, im not getting enough of it (and yes i do get a little joy by being able to say spm without feeling weights all over my shoulders)

oh ...i just cant complain much. at least i do not have the lifespan of flies.

christmas is up soon!
im not really in the mood yet. still too bugged down by bugs. lol. feverish every now and then. i have no gawking idea how im going to go about it this year. usually i go about selling christmas cards for funds...... i guess i could take in a few last minute orders....... oh no no ... it will be too late by the time i return from thailand. but do tell me if you want to see them anyways.

lots of love from yours truly, the moon. (get it??)

okay...i said i was coming back. for once i actually meant to come back and type in another post or two after dinner. but as comically possible, twist of fate had me down with chicken pox. so there i was. lying on the bed. sicker than i have ever been all year round. who would have had had known that it was so excruciating.it wasnt the itch . honestly there werent much itch at all. it was, in fact the constant aches all over and the sleeplessness when you want to and the sleeping when the sun is up. it wasnt as easily simple as i am describing it but trust me when i say its not a bloody bed of roses. i would know. i love roses. but thats not the point so where was i?.... no i cant recall. but who bloody cares. there are so many things to do now that im a new person. literally. my face can be the ultimate metaphor to describe the goddamned surface of mars..

sigh...i really do have so much emotions in me. too much for a guy. sometimes i dont think of myself as a male. more like...... a crab. a simple, sidewalking, bottomfeeding, shortlived, sometimes a delicacy crustacean. i would have loved that. (its my other personality talking)

oh god no. im getting nauseas again...... right now i live day by day telling myself this would not befall me again.why why why would this infuriating,skin-inflaming disease be a necessary creation of god? WHY???????>>>>>

flashbacks!

ok here goes. i know spm was long over and my blog had been more dead than ever , but you cant blame me for wanting to do nothing after so many years of being under the governmental education system. i have been looking forward for this way long before spm even started. nevertheless i have had my wish and right now its killing me that im too free. who would have had known that doing nothing could be so frustrating. it goes up into my head and gives me mood swings. every now and then i have to remind myself that i have a phallus and im not pregnant.

spm was without a doubt no fun.i studied so much i wanted to cry and just sleep. although there were days between exams but the timing is so ridiculous. fancy having exams from eight in the morning to four in the afternoon. by the time it ended we were all so exhausted that just thinking of physics test the next day might be fatal. i would have had taken pictures of all the sebum coated faces and tousled hairs but i was just as wrecked. so nevermind that.

people keeps telling me that i would miss school and i am sure i will but right now, i just want to hate it. and then i can realise how true what they all said and tell people younger than me they will miss school so the whole cycle can start again. its the whole experience, kinda like a rite of passage.

i say that if you can endure spm ( if you are the serious about it la) you can endure almost (a.l.m.o.s.t.) anything. you learn to divide your time to chapters you need to study, survive on minimal sleep and nervous breakdowns. i have had my share of all that and by the time its all over, you seriously feel grateful everytime you wake up in the middle of the night, look at the time, and remind yourself that you can still sleep for another four hours. i still recall how i would sleep for half an hour between studying sessions so that i wouldnt think of all the negative things in the world. thank god the mumbai thing happened after the exams (RIP: its worth another post later)

i now believe on the existence of post spm stress. its not only the results you are worried of, but more of all the stress you put on yourself so that you have fun. too much fun is bad for you. and so is trying too hard.

ok im going to scram right now but I WILL BE BACK>>